Life can be humbling. Human beings sometimes behave like molecules bumping around, sometimes crashing into one another. Whether these collisions become a catalyst for growth or for devastation depends on many factors.
A week or two ago, I wrote these words:
I feel raw and a little bit emotionally depleted. Sometimes relating to others close to us can be nurturing and helpful. But other times it’s draining and painful. I guess in a fallen world, we will encounter the best and the worst of human behavior.
Sometimes we need to apply a whole lot of grace, set boundaries, and do the work of growing in our communication with others. When something happens that hurts us, we don’t need to minimize the impact but God has called us to ultimately forgive others because He first forgave us. This isn’t our human nature. But if we don’t forgive, we end up bitter and resentful. It’s important to remember that forgiveness doesn’t mean you instantly trust the person who hurt you. Trust is earned and some people never do the work to earn trust again. But when people carry un-forgiveness in their hearts over the long term, they often become bitter or their own health suffers.
God knew that forgiveness helps us move forward less encumbered, and it’s part of the healing process. Is it easy? No. And it may not be instantaneous. It doesn’t mean that your emotions aren’t valid and that you didn’t experience hurt as a result of this action or those hurtful words. But for your own healing and growth, it’s good to move towards releasing the burden that comes with holding onto offenses. Ultimately everyone is accountable for their lives and actions before God. So I trust God to handle things and I walk in freedom when I let go of hurtful things and forgive (with His help).
I have loved ones I care about who are hurting right now. I pray God will minister to them and strengthen them in the midst of very tough times.
Some of us are walking through grief, and it can feel like the waves will wash us out to sea. I have often said grief can be like a sneaker wave, and unless you know how to swim parallel to the shore, the rip tides can pull you under. Grief and even other interpersonal challenges can suck the joy out of some moments. But I remind myself that sorrow and joy can coexist.
Someone recently wrote the phrase “toxic positivity.” While this does exist, I feel differently about expressions of hope and the remnants of joy in the heart of a believer who is in the midst of deep waters. It’s not toxic positivity to allow faith and hope to anchor our souls. You see, no matter how dark life feels or looks, or how many waves come suddenly to sweep us off our feet, the paradox still exists for a believer.
Isaiah 61 highlights the powerful contrasts:
Beauty for ashes.
Comfort and the oil of joy for those who mourn.
Hope that shines like a lighthouse on a craggy stone outpost…faith as an anchor of the soul.
(I took this blurry photo from a ship in the Inland Passages of Alaska, although this may have been closer to Vancouver Island, British Columbia, taken in 2024. I don’t know why, but I enjoy the image despite it not being all that clear.)
Here’s Isaiah 61 (KJV):
The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek; he hath sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound;
2 To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn;
3 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.
4 And they shall build the old wastes, they shall raise up the former desolations, and they shall repair the waste cities, the desolations of many generations.
5 And strangers shall stand and feed your flocks, and the sons of the alien shall be your plowmen and your vinedressers.
6 But ye shall be named the Priests of the Lord: men shall call you the Ministers of our God: ye shall eat the riches of the Gentiles, and in their glory shall ye boast yourselves.
7 For your shame ye shall have double; and for confusion they shall rejoice in their portion: therefore in their land they shall possess the double: everlasting joy shall be unto them.
8 For I the Lord love judgment, I hate robbery for burnt offering; and I will direct their work in truth, and I will make an everlasting covenant with them.
9 And their seed shall be known among the Gentiles, and their offspring among the people: all that see them shall acknowledge them, that they are the seed which the Lord hath blessed.
10 I will greatly rejoice in the Lord, my soul shall be joyful in my God; for he hath clothed me with the garments of salvation, he hath covered me with the robe of righteousness, as a bridegroom decketh himself with ornaments, and as a bride adorneth herself with her jewels.
11 For as the earth bringeth forth her bud, and as the garden causeth the things that are sown in it to spring forth; so the Lord God will cause righteousness and praise to spring forth before all the nations.
Sometimes I need encouragement on some topic I wrote about previously. Or I remember an article someone else here wrote that spoke to my heart. I’m really grateful for this community.
I remember when I first started writing here roughly nine months ago, someone had words of wisdom. They said even if it takes time to find your readers, keep writing consistently because in doing so, you will create a body of work you can feel proud of.
I want to encourage you to keep writing, and as you write on topics you care about, you’re creating a library of articles you can refer to later.
As I continue working on my book, I am aware of how writing here has given me confidence and lots of helpful feedback on what resonates with readers. It’s very meaningful to hear from readers who say something we wrote touched their hearts.
God is so faithful to use words as a healing force. When I think about His speaking creation into being, and the beauty and wonder of God’s Word, I understand we were created in His image. So the instinct to write and create comes from Him. I write with a desire to glorify Him. As He comforts and helps me through the challenges of this life, I write, praying others might be strengthened and encouraged somehow, too.
That’s the redemptive nature of His love. We are being conformed into His image. My prayer is that over time there is less of me and more of Him.
Tonight as a I sit by our fire, I’m reluctant to go to bed. It’s probably because after attending our family celebration of life for my uncle and the long drive, I took a nap for several hours. I felt so sleepy when I got home.
But I think there’s another reason I am staying up a while, enjoying the cozy fireplace and time to reflect. Do you ever have a day that fills up your heart in a significant way, and you don’t want to bid the day goodbye just yet?
Being with family today felt really good. I loved seeing cousins and watching the children and the dogs play in the beautiful log cabin where my cousin and his wife live. The country drive to reach their house took about an hour, but we passed vineyards and old country churches, grain elevators and the country cemetery where many loved ones were laid to rest.
We gathered today to remember the life of my Uncle Jim. I loved my uncle, and I am very thankful that my brother and my mom and I were able to spend today with family who loved him, too. Some of his sons and their families and grandkids were there as well. We missed Kris, who had planned to come, but the pass was closed due to snow between here and where he lives in Idaho.
I thought today about our stories. Every person has a story, and we often see redemption and grace in our stories. But at times, we see a tragedy unfold, with the possibility of hope and redemption remaining.
I have enjoyed my time writing on Substack so far…it’s been a joy. I am grateful for the relationships formed with other writers and the meaningful interactions shared here. I think it’s remarkable how technology can be used in shallow ways, or to go deeper and I have found such great fellowship here at times.
Today as we set aside time to remember my uncle, I thought of other family we’ve loved who are no longer with us. Eternity awaits.
We lost my high school classmate this year, too. Todd died the night before my 40th class reunion, and we all felt heartbroken that he lost his battle with cancer. Some of my readers aren’t yet 40, so they may think I’m ancient. But I want to say that two things remain true: Our lives here go by so quickly, and I want to use mine for His glory. But also, as my Japanese student used to say to me, “Life is long, go slow.”
While in light of eternity our lives on earth take up a short period of time, I often think of life as an hourglass, with sand pouring from the top to the bottom. I want to make the most of the life I’ve been given. I want to love well and use my time in redemptive ways.
But I liked what my Japanese student said as well. Sometimes we live at a harried pace, and we glorify the word “busy” but I don’t think we need to live as though we are on the way to a fire. People write about slow living and hygge, a cozy approach to life. I just know that being fully present to life and those God’s given us to love truly matters.
Take the time to have tea with a beloved friend. Tomorrow morning, my husband asked if we could go out for coffee before church. I enjoy doing something special with him, and we want to take time to do some watercolor together soon. His Christmas vacation went by quickly, and I also had some extra time off. I spent a lot of my time preparing for this family memorial we held today.
Whatever you’re up to, remember life is long, go slow.
But don’t take your days for granted or squander your time doing meaningless things.
Photo credit: Sue Kuenzi 2024
Father, please help me to number my days, aware that each moment is a gift from You. Help me lean into You and spend time in Your Word each day, so that I’ll have a heart aligned with Your Presence and truth.
Thank You for my uncle’s life. Thanks for my cousins, my brother and my Mom being able to gather together today. We will all miss Uncle Jim. Please be with my Aunt Marlene, and encourage her heart as she misses her husband.
We feel so grateful that You’re our God and all of our days were ordained before one of them came to be. Thank You that nothing can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus (Romans 8).
In Jesus’ Powerful Name,
Amen
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Like the thought of going slow. As highlighted in Isaiah 61, I want to be one of those trees, a planting of the Lord, for his glory!
The title of this post alone is enough!